Dear nealann, Thanksgiving was surprisingly nice, I had forgotten how many friends I have. Thank you for talking to my friend, it gave my great solice. I'm happy that you are with mom, and gram and ramm. And that is such a beautiful place. Now i just need for J to heal some, cause he really hurt me by not believing me. The bottom line though is that I am taking care of myself, I created alot of wreckage for you and M, and I guess by extension with J. I care that I never go back to those places. That I live my life in a fashion for which I can be proud; that I live the remainder of my life based on spiritual principles and that maybe then I can again gain the trust of M, and the respect of J. that is what I care about. I love you so much, and I will miss you everyday for the rest of my life.